PDF Download Loving Someone Who Has Dementia: How to Find Hope while Coping with Stress and Grief

PDF Download Loving Someone Who Has Dementia: How to Find Hope while Coping with Stress and Grief

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Loving Someone Who Has Dementia: How to Find Hope while Coping with Stress and Grief

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From the Back Cover

Loving Someone Who Has Dementia is a much-needed guide that offers proven strategies for managing ongoing stress and grief. Dr. Pauline Boss outlines seven guidelines for staying resilient while caring for someone who has dementia and offers hope when experiencing "ambiguous loss"—having a loved one both here and not here, physically present but psychologically absent. Loving Someone Who Has Dementia is written for anyone touched by the epidemic of dementia: caregivers, family members, friends, neighbors, as well as educators and professionals. Written in easy-to-understand conversational language, this vital resource is based on solid research and years of clinical practice. Dr. Boss gives you the tools you need to embrace rather than resist the ambiguity in your relationship with someone who has dementia. Praise for Loving Someone Who Has Dementia "Pauline Boss's book is a revelation about how to live with a profoundly changed relationship that, despite dementia, remains a relationship. This groundbreaking therapist takes the struggling reader by the hand and offers new and very specific ways to find a path from helplessness and despair to peace and strength."—Francine Russo, author, They're Your Parents, Too! How Siblings Can Survive Their Parents' Aging Without Driving Each Other Crazy "This book is a must for anyone suffering alongside a loved one with dementia. Dr. Boss writes with the wisdom of a scholar and the warmth of a family therapist."—Vern L. Bengtson, PhD, former president, The Gerontological Society of America "A gift to caregivers, in particular 'boomers' who find themselves in a role for which they are unprepared ? Intelligent and sensitive ? a fine contribution."—Gail Sheehy, best-selling author of Passages in Caregiving By the author of Ambiguous Loss

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About the Author

Pauline Boss, PhD, is emeritus professor at the University of Minnesota and was visiting professor at Harvard Medical School, 1995–1996, and Hunter School of Social Work, 2004–2005. She is best known for her groundbreaking research as the pioneer theorist and clinical practitioner of stress reduction for people whose loved ones are ambiguously lost.

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Product details

Paperback: 256 pages

Publisher: Jossey-Bass; 1 edition (August 9, 2011)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 1118002296

ISBN-13: 978-1118002292

Product Dimensions:

5.9 x 0.8 x 9 inches

Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review:

4.4 out of 5 stars

121 customer reviews

Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#30,131 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

I'd actually like to give this book six stars. My husband has dementia and Pauline's book touches on so many of my daily feelings, the ups and downs, constant unpredictability, fears and hopes, and she offers good ways to accept what is happening, and be more at peace with the changes in my relationship with my husband. I thought it would be another difficult book to read, but it is straightforward and there is so much to which I can relate. There are a number of really good books about dementia but this book is different, it is deeply personal. I recommend not reading the book too fast, I read a chapter and then thought about it for a few days before I read the next one.

My wife has the disease and as it progresses, there are times that I have a lot of difficulty dealing with the associated behavior. This book is outstanding in helping to get a grip on what is happening to my wonderful 50 year partner. I have more understanding of the anquish she is going through. I downloaded to the Kindle app and could highlight passages that were important to me. Now when I start to get down, I simply scan through the highlights in 10 min and get myself righted. I highly recommend this book for someone struggling with a loved one who has dementia.

Ambiguity is My Newfound Path to FreedomI find “ambiguity” as tasty as green eggs and ham, but I DON’T LIKE GREEN EGGS AND HAM! I like certainty – with items on my plate appearing well-organized and appetizing. Dementia makes life messy and gives people who care for them upset stomachs. In “Loving Someone Who Has Dementia,” Dr. Pauline Boss becomes another Dr. Seuss who provides readers a creative approach to managing dementia through the lens of ambiguity.Whereas the reality of dementia is complex, Dr. Boss writes, the joy of ambiguity allows caregivers to use their imaginations, find the middle ground and allow for “both-and thinking.” She believes that ambiguity is the essence of spirituality and caring for patients with dementia requires resilience, compassion and mindfulness. Dr. Boss shows caregivers how to proceed through the maze of ambiguity, reducing their stress and anxiety.As an emergency physician, I care for both patients with dementia and the caregivers who love them. In the tension between duty and empathy, Dr. Boss gave me one piece of sound advice to help resolve conflict between doing more and doing less. She advised me to not know all the answers, but to simply ask, “What would help?” She challenged me to “illuminate ambiguity” with the purpose of adding meaning and hope to the situation.“Uncertainty is my path to freedom” is a mantra I’ve learned through practicing of yoga. It’s a statement that requires introspection and it’s a journey of sorts. Substituting the word “uncertainty” with “ambiguity” allows me to compassionately guide caregivers and dementia patients along their own paths to freedom.

While I enjoyed this book, I do think that it over-simplified the problem somewhat. "Ambiguous Loss" and indeed, Ambiguous Feelings can mean so many different things to many different people facing this problem.Many of the author's suggestions about family members helping, and continuing with traditions, I feel were valid; however it is difficult in this day and age to have family members, who may be scattered all over the country, assist with any problem, much less dementia. In many ways, the intact family unit has disappeared.From the tone of the book I also felt that patience was expected more often than not. Sometimes it is difficult to be patient while living with a person with this disease, that literally robs you of your whole existence. I did enjoy this book, but I thought that basically, it was a basic primer on the topic and not an in-depth look at dementia.

A must-read for anyone caring for or loving a person diagnosed with any form of dementia. I've re-read it three times, and reference it often as I care for my spouse, and a close relative bought a copy so she could understand and appreciate the challenges of caring for someone struggling with this terrible disease. It strongly and accurately reinforces the role, rewards, and frustrations of the caregiver, and how persons who don't have the 24x7 exposure to the patient can often misunderstand and downplay the impacts of dementia on the patient and the caregiver.

I just placed my husband in an Alzheimer's facility 2 months ago and could really relate to the grieving thing. Everytime I go to visit him, I grieve which many people just don't get. They are used to a conclusion upon death but this book really discusses the continual grieving which is part of the Alzheimer's Caregivers experience. I am glad I read the book and am understanding my continual loss much better. For anyone who knows a Caregiver for an Alzheimer's patient, this is a good book to read.

I have not finished yet, but have found many interesting and thoughtful ideas. My wife has a similar condition with P.S.P ..a progressive Parkinson condition,, and I see the condition getting worse..as I am losing her. As a Care Giver I am doing more and more and more..but so far I have been very fortunate in having much family support that is close by and can see the same deterioration. It is worth while reading for any Care Giver in these situations.

If you are a caregiver for someone with this devastating disease, you need this book. Alzheimer's runs in my family. We took care of my father, and I am now caring for my sister. The toll it takes on the caregiver is enormous, both physically and mentally. This book helps you understand how you can and must take care of yourself while also loving and caring for your loved one.

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Loving Someone Who Has Dementia: How to Find Hope while Coping with Stress and Grief PDF

Loving Someone Who Has Dementia: How to Find Hope while Coping with Stress and Grief PDF

Loving Someone Who Has Dementia: How to Find Hope while Coping with Stress and Grief PDF

Loving Someone Who Has Dementia: How to Find Hope while Coping with Stress and Grief PDF